When They Come Crawling Back: The Curious Case of the 1:15 A.M. Call

In the world of love, timing is everything. Just when you think you’ve finally put the past behind you, there it is—an unexpected call that sends you spiraling back to old emotions. One moment, you’re sipping your evening tea, content in your singlehood, and the next, your phone lights up with the name of someone who used to mean the world to you.

Let’s be honest: we’ve all been there. That late-night ring triggers a pit in your stomach and tempts you to engage with someone who clearly doesn’t understand the concept of “moving on.” The decision to hit “ignore” feels empowering, but what happens when that late-night call isn’t a mistake, but the start of yet another chapter in a never-ending cycle of “let’s try this again”?

Picture this: It’s late on a Sunday, the streets are quiet, and the whole city is asleep. She’s drifting off when suddenly, her phone lights up. It’s him—Mr. Midnight, popping up on her screen like a pop quiz she’s already aced. Without hesitation, she cuts the call and blocks his number, putting him on an indefinite “Do Not Disturb.” It’s almost poetic, the quiet satisfaction that comes from swiping left on an ex’s late-night drama.

And this isn’t the first time she’s heard from Mr. Midnight. He’s got this Houdini habit of disappearing, reappearing, and always at the worst possible times. But this time, she’s done with the magic act. The curtain is down, the show's over, and her silence is the applause.

The Witching Hour Dilemma

Why the late-night call? It’s always the same. He shows up at 1:15 a.m., right when the whole city is sound asleep and regrets are running high. Maybe he’s feeling nostalgic, or maybe it’s just the last call syndrome—a need to be heard at an hour when he’s most alone. It’s not about her; it’s about needing a voice, a warm response to soothe his ego. And she’s learned that nothing good ever happens after midnight, especially when it’s a blast from the past on the other end of the line.

Silence is the New Reply-All

Here’s the thing: responding to him would have been easy. She could’ve fired off a message like, “Don’t ever call me again,” but she knows better. Silence, she’s realized, is the ultimate power move. It says everything she needs to without wasting a single word. It’s her way of saying, “I’ve moved on,” without actually saying anything at all.

In this case, silence isn’t just golden; it’s platinum. She’s done with being pulled back into his orbit. She’s made her decision, and her lack of response is the clearest message she could send. After all, what can he argue with when there’s nothing to argue against?

Blocking: The New Boundary

Now, about the block. Blocking isn’t just technical; it’s personal. It’s her way of saying, “I’m choosing me.” Mr. Midnight may think he’s making a grand gesture, but she’s seen this act before. He comes back, charms his way in, only to ghost her as soon as things get real. This time, she’s drawing a line—no, a wall. Blocking isn’t about avoiding him; it’s about valuing herself enough to know she deserves better than a late-night ego trip.

She’s protecting her peace, her sanity, and her time. And, really, when you’re finally done, there’s no need to make a scene. You just lock the door, shut off the lights, and let them knock all they want on a door that will never open again.

Choosing Herself Over the Cycle

It’s funny, really. She used to wait for these grand gestures, thinking they meant something. But now, she knows the real power move isn’t in reacting. It’s in letting go. Mr. Midnight might come back around someday, but this time, he’ll find there’s no one waiting. She’s moved on to bigger and better dreams, leaving the late-night calls and their drama behind.

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 The 'Woman Card’: Power Play or Just a Ploy?

It’s been a while since I’ve sat down to write—work has been all-consuming, like trying to fit your life into a too-tight pair of jeans. But here I am, thanks to my overtime hustle, constantly proving my worth in a room full of people who don’t seem to notice. 

The other day, when I casually mentioned my exhaustion to a colleague, his response? "Why don’t you just play the woman card and get out of the extra work?"

I couldn’t help but wonder: since when did the "woman card" come with the luxury of skipping overtime? Isn’t it just basic human decency to not overwork someone? And yet, here it was—the infamous "woman card" being thrown at me like a get-out-of-jail-free card I didn’t ask for.

Every woman I know has heard it at least once: "Just play the woman card." But here’s the irony—this advice almost always comes from a man. Especially in the corporate world, where, if you dare to mention any issue you’re facing—be it stress, workload, or unfair treatment—you’re likely to hear, "Just play the woman card."

But let’s get real. What does "playing the woman card" even mean from a man’s perspective?

It’s a quick escape, like slipping out the back door of a party without saying goodbye.

It’s a silent "threat" they think we can use to make others back off.

It’s seen as the easiest, least complicated way to get what we want—no fuss, no muss. (Oh, how I wish it were that simple.)

It’s their idea of a "smart move" to navigate challenges without getting pushback.

But here’s the kicker: how often do we, as women, actually get to "play" this magical card?

Spoiler alert: not as often as you might think. If the woman card really held so much power, do you think we’d be burning the midnight oil in the office, debugging code that refuses to cooperate? Or heading back to work right after having a baby? Or working through the aches of a menstrual cycle while pretending we feel fine?

The truth is, life isn’t nearly as glamorous as men seem to believe when they toss out the idea of the woman card. If it were that easy, we’d all be walking around with free passes, and nobody would ever be stuck in the trenches.

So next time a woman tells you she’s struggling, don’t jump to suggest the "woman card." Instead, ask yourself: is there really a card to be played, or is this just a situation where empathy and understanding are needed? Maybe it’s not about escaping the game—it’s about changing how we play it altogether.

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If He Knows, He Knows!

I sat down to write this after a conversation with a friend. She had just finished telling me about a guy she met at a random café. He wanted something casual—*nothing serious*. But now? He’s getting engaged to the love of his life. And she couldn’t help but wonder: Why didn’t he feel that way about me? Was I not enough? Was I not what he was looking for? 

It’s funny how quickly we, as women, turn inward, questioning ourselves the moment we aren't chosen. We start analyzing every little detail, every interaction, as if the answer lies somewhere in what we did—or didn’t do.

After the call, I couldn’t shake a certain thought: when a man knows, he just knows. There’s no hesitation. “No coulda, woulda, shoulda”. Whether it’s bending over backwards to get her parents’ approval, flying across the country to be there for her birthday, or proposing after just a few months of dating—when he’s with the right girl, he knows. He acts.

 

 

But here’s the real question: why do men stick around with women they know aren’t "the one"? Why do they keep us close enough to stay but distant enough to never really be there?

The truth is, men crave love and attention just as much as we do. But the difference is this: some can settle for the wrong kind, while others can’t. One friend tells me, *Men just aren’t ready to commit* and yet another is sending out save-the-dates for her wedding to a guy who committed in a heartbeat.

So, do men really fear commitment? Or is it that they only fear committing to the wrong person? Because unless you’re *her*, you’ll always be the woman he can *go to* but never the one he *lets* in. You could follow the unwritten “101 Ways to Be His Girl,” but with the right woman, that rulebook doesn’t even exist.

It’s funny but true: if you find yourself in a relationship filled with more questions than answers, you’ll never stop searching for clarity. But what if, instead of settling for the guy who makes you feel uncertain, you wait for the one who brings the certainty with him? The man who doesn’t make you question your worth, but adds meaning to your life. The one who feels like *home*.

So, it leaves me wondering: Men, when you already know what you want, why waste time with someone you don’t? Is it that hard to be honest with us—or with yourselves?

Thanks for reading!

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